1. Had a really great "Night Out" last night,
According to my police report.
2. I will win, Not immediately But Definitely.'
3. If you're talking behind my back, you're in
a good position to kiss my ass!
4. Dear Math, please grow up and solve your
own problems, I'm tired of solving them for
you.
5. The road to success is always under
construction.
6. Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever
will.
7. Born to express not to impress.
8. Silent people have the loudest minds.
9. Sometimes it's easier to pretend you don't
care, than to admit it's killing you.
10. You cannot stop the waves but you can
learn to surf.
11. Life is like photography, You use the
negatives to develop.
12. Two things are infinite: the universe and
human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the
universe.
13. War doesn't determine who's right. War
determines who's left.
14. When someone says, "You've Changed", It
simply means you've stopped living your life
their way.
15. If you want to make your dreams come
true, The first thing you have to do is wake up.
16. I don't have dirty mind, I have Sexy
imagination.
17. Whenever i think of quit smoking, I need
a cigarette to think.
18. You never know how strong you are, until
being strong is the only choice you have.
19. You have to be ODD, to be number ONE.
20. When life puts you in tough situations,
don't say, why me? Just say, try me!
21. I stopped fighting with my inner demons.
We are on the same side Now.
22. If people are trying to bring you 'Down', It
only means that you are 'Above them'.
23. Failure is the opportunity to begin again
more intelligently.
24. The greatest advantage of speaking the
truth is that you don't have to remember what
you said.
25. Nothing in the world is more common
than unsuccessful people with talent.
26. Be a good person, But don't try to prove.
27. Mistakes are proof that you are trying.
28. Some people are alive only, Because it's
illegal to kill them.
29. I am not failed......My success is just
postponed.
30. If you like me Then raise your hand, If not
then raise your standard.
31. When i was born..Devil said.."Oh Shit..!!
Competition".
32. I work for money, For loyalty Hire a Dog.
33. I am always right, Once i thought that I
am wrong, But i was wrong.
34. I know i am something, Because god
doesn't create garbage.
35. If you are gonna be two-faced, Honey at
least make one of them pretty!
36. When nothing goes right..!! Go left.
37. If you can't convince them, Confuse them.
38. I love to walk in fog, Because nobody
knows i am smoking.
39. I am not drunk, I am just chemically off-
balanced.
40. Oh, So you wanna argue, Bring it. I got
my CAPS LOCK ON.
41. I am so poor that i can't pay attention in
class.
42. Warning...I know KARATE.......And few
other oriental words.
43. I used to be an atheist, But then i realized
i'm God.
44. Never make eye contact while eating a
banana.
45. Success is like being pregnant everybody
congratulates you, But nobody knows how
many times you got fucked to get there.
46. I am not virgin, My life fucks me
everyday.
47. Nothing is over until you stop trying.
48. Person you love is 72.8% water.
49. I talk to myself because i like dealing with
a better class of people.
50. People say, you can't live without love...I
think oxygen is more important.
51. 80% of boys have girlfriends.. Rest 20%
are having brain.
52. When everything comes your way.. Then
you are on the wrong way.
53. she's so fake, if you look behind her neck.
I bet it says "Made in china".
54. I drink to make other people interesting.
55. If at first, you don't succeed..Keep
flushing.
56. Save water drink beer.
57. Virginity is not dignity, It is just lack
of opportunity.
58. Not all men are fools, Some stay
bachelor.
59. Don't kiss behind the garden, Love is
blind but the neighbors are not.
60. His story is History, My Story is Mystery.
61. Phones are better than girlfriends, At
least we can switch off.
62. Smile today, tomorrow could be worse.
63. The difference between stupidity and
genius is that genius has its limits.
64. If you don't succeed at first, hide all
evidence that you tried.
65. Stop worrying about the world ending
today. It's already tomorrow in Australia.
66. Cell phones these days keep getting
thinner and smarter... people the opposite.
67. Diet rule #1: If nobody sees you eating it,
it doesn't contain any calories.
68. I love my job only when I'm on vacation
69. Friends come and go, but enemies remain
and build up.
70. Never test how deep the water is with
both feet.
71. The richer you get, the more expensive
happiness becomes.
72. Parachute for sale, used once, never
opened!!
73. My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the
same way.
74. FREE PUPPIES: Half cocker spaniel, half
sneaky neighbors dog.
75. Behind every successful man is a
surprised woman.
76. In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just
the decision maker.
77. I'm not online, it's just an optical illusion.
78. That's the secret to life... replace one
worry with another.
79. If there is a "WILL", there are 500
relatives.
80. How is a poor man a lot like a rich man?
They both have an iPhone.
81. Some people call me Mike, you can call
me tonight.
82. When inspiration does not come to me, I
go halfway to meet it.
83. Whatever it is -- I didn't do it!
84. Sometimes you succeed.... and other
times you learn.
85. There are three sides to an argument -
your side, my side and the right side.
86. When there's a will, I want to be in it.
87. Failure is not an option -- it comes
bundled with Windows.
88. I always dream of being a millionaire like
my uncle!... He's dreaming too.
89. I believe there should be a better way to
start each day... instead of waking up every
morning.
90. When I was kidnapped, my parents
snapped into action. They rented out my
room.
91. Scratch here ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ to reveal
my status
92. I'd rather have honest enemies than fake
friends.
93. My "last seen at" was just to check your
"last seen at".
94. Not always "Available".. Try your Luck..
95. Hey there whatsapp is using me.
96. I'm not lazy, I'm on energy saving mode.
97. You can never buy Love....But still you
have to pay for it.
98. Totally available!! Please disturb me!!
99. “Success” all depends on the second
letter.
100. Life is Short – Chat Fast!
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